The one on the right is probably Charlotte

One of the many pleasures of Patrick O’Brian is his refreshing lack of sentimentality on certain topics. Here, from The Mauritius Command, is the scene in which Captain Aubrey introduces his close friend Dr. Stephen Maturin to Aubrey’s twin daughters:

Jack led him up the stairs into a little sloping room, upon whose floor sat two bald babies, dressed in fresh frocks. They had pale, globular faces, and in the middle of each face a surprisingly long and pointed nose called the turnip to an impartial observer’s mind....

‘Very fine children,’ said Stephen. ‘I should have known them anywhere.’

‘I cannot tell one from t’other,’ said Jack. ‘You would not credit the din they can kick up if things are not quite to their liking. The one on the right is probably Charlotte.’ He stared at them; they stared at him, unwinking. ‘What do you think of them, Stephen?’ he asked, tapping his forehead significantly.

Stephen resumed his professional role. He had delivered some scores of babies at the Rotunda in his student days, but since then his practice had lain among adults, particularly among seafaring adults, and few men of his professional standing could have been worse qualified for this task; however, he picked them up, listened to their hearts and lungs, opened their mouths and peered within, bent their limbs, and made motions before their eyes.

‘How old are they?’ he asked.

‘Why, they must be quite old by now,’ said Jack. ‘They seem to have been here for ever.’

Realism in retirement planning

Investment companies and financial journalists often seem to assume that planning for one’s retirement is so simple that only the thoughtless or the reckless will get it wrong. Start saving as early as possible, they say. Save at least 10% of your pre-tax income. Invest in low-cost stock funds, and consider shifting a percentage of your nest egg to bonds as you get closer to retirement.

The economic devastation of the past few years has given this approach an air of unreality. Except for the very richest among us, real wages have been stagnant for years. Housing prices have plummeted to the point where many people owe more on their mortgages than their homes are worth. Credit card debts are climbing and savings are almost nonexistent. The old advice is still good, as far as it goes, but ordinary people are having to scramble just to get from one month to the next.

The New York Times, to its credit, is starting to get this. A recent article on borrowing from your 401(k) plan doesn’t try to argue that it’s a good idea, just that it might sometimes be preferable to the alternatives. “These are tricky times,” the paper says. “Banks are frantically reducing the credit lines on existing home equity loans. Credit card issuers are deploying similar tactics. That makes 401(k) loans a more attractive option, or sometimes the only remaining one, for people who need money.”

The Times article lays out the rules governing 401(k) loans, the pros and cons, and links to a helpful calculator that tells you what your loan will cost you in the long run.

A Basket of Leaves is now available!

I mentioned it already in passing, but I don’t mind saying it again. My first book, A Basket of Leaves: 99 Books That Capture the Spirit of Africa, is now available for sale from booksellers including Amazon, Amazon Canada, Amazon UK, Powell’s, Alibris, and AbeBooks. Journey through the 54 countries of Africa through novels, memoirs, travel books, and even some poetry.

A wonderful new home

My partner Jenn has created this wonderful new 21st century version of my website, which now includes my blog. If you’ve been reading my work at Blogspot, please start coming here to view new posts.